Beautiful leaves of a tree from South West France
I have a special thought for expatriate children today;
How many times have I heard
"Children? They adapt to their new environment in six months time ! They learn a new language, they have new friends and as they have mum/mom and dad, no worries! "
No, I do not think this is what happens all the time
Each child, like every adult, perceives and reacts to their environment in a unique way, depending on their personality and their life experience
Some will adapt quickly and easily to their new environment,
For others it will be longer, more or less painful, and some children can go through a depressive phase before, in most cases, reach a state of wellness
So they do all adapt ?
Probably. Do they have another choice? What is the price to pay for some of them ?
The child's age is a factor to consider in helping them move on their adaptation journey quickly and securely;
The fact that parents themselves are satisfied with their international assignment is without doubt a major parameter;
A first expatriation may be more sensitive
The recognition of the singularity of the child's experience, the possibility they can have to express it and share it is undoubtedly important as well;
Parents are the first people to listen to their child when they can;
For various reasons, it can be difficult for them to do so, tense relations with a teenager, malaise of the parents themselves, marital tensions . . . all could be linked directly or indirectly to the expatriation
The effects of a situation experienced by a suffering child can be felt in the short-term, like sleep patterns modifications, changes in behaviour. . . in the medium or long term too like refusal, anxiety anchored on a particular point
I think a professional should be available at all times for parents and for children to meet, listen and support them, help them go through certain stages when they feel necessary. The contact should be easy.
Through school? Through the employer?
I am there sharing with you a project that I want to create for years now !
What do you think ? How do you feel your children coped with this expatriation or another one ?
I wish you a wonderful day ! ! !
My dear friend...
RépondreSupprimerI miss talking to you...
As you know my little munchkin (4 years old) had a really hard time at first. And it is like you say change in sleep, anxiety, but as soon as our container (tainer for her!) arrived and she saw her toys and her bed... Things she new and made her feel safe things started to change. Then Christmas vacation with our family to boost our moods and promises to come for a visit.
It is our 1st expatriation and adaptation was very difficult for us, after 6 months some days are still not easy but friends make a big difference and sharing experiences as well as advices. Families that have been moving around the world for some time now have a very different approach and are a big source of information.
in retrospectives, children have no choice but to adapt even at a young age they have to deal with their own worries.
It will be a wonderful experience, no doubt, but I will think twice the next time we are offered an opportunity like this one before putting all my family through these 6 very hard months.
Sandra
Pia if you want to share this comment on the blog for all to see please do I do not know how to do it.